Tuesday, June 14, 2011

I WAS...

Annoying. Super rebel. Labile. Confused. Frustrated. Angry. Fearful. Sad. Lonely. If I look back and see how I behave back then, I feel like seeing a stranger. Well it doesn't mean that I hate myself, I was just lost from this life path and had nowhere to go. I was isolated from others. I keep the anger by myself before eventually 'splashing' it to the ones who supposed to be innocent. I have no desire to live, it seemed that I   was a living dead. I wasn't able to be happy. Come to think of it, my past is pretty much sad and maybe I felt that way because I regret my past too much.

photo ©2006 maile lani

Yet I am now glad that I can put the words 'I was', because I have no excuse to be angry for now. I found my life path once again, walking on it with awareness and joy. Even if I'm still annoying or angry sometimes, I am grateful that I am able to heal myself from them :) Perhaps the past was just an experience for me to develop my emphatic sense and to understand the desperate ones, and to be able to give them a helping hand.

The past me is a character that gives me this passion to help people anyway I can. Every time I saw lonely people, I remembered myself back then and so I understand how this person feels.

No matter how horrible I was, there's always a positive lesson I can receive so I don't have to regret. By experiencing loneliness and agony, I become empathic with others. By finding the solution trough it right now, I can help others to stand up as well :) And by doing this I become happier than ever! <3

YOU can be a true motivator either, the one that supports people, the one that raise people up from the pit of loneliness and agony. Just remember that there's nothing to be afraid of because what we fear is only a distraction and illusions. We breath this life together, forever!

Namaste~

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