My grandfather gave me abilities that most people consider psychic such as experiencing strange yet meaningful dreams, astral projecting, and energy healing. Other than these abilities is the ability to feel people (empathy). It's different than sympathy, as told by this simple yet informative video:
But sometimes it comes to an extreme level where the person's inner conflict and emotions influence mine. I remember one day in school where I got to sit with a group of girls and one of them had issues with quite everyone else (that time I was completely neutral because I didn't even know her and I don't want to be judgmental) so there were rumors about her spreading around. She looked happy and fine as she talked to her friends, but I knew that deep inside she was in turmoil because I felt her. I felt a sudden pain in my chest that came out of nowhere.
There is another event; I was in the car with one of my instructors and I've been told that his wife had passed away years ago, leaving him and their son behind. As he drove the car in silence, I felt his lost, loneliness, and his love to the deceased wife. I somehow knew that he doesn't want to marry again because he wanted to remain loyal, which is why I salute him. Yet at the same time I felt really bad for him and I could feel my heart ripping slowly during the silence.
This ability is one of few reasons why I can never stand the crowd, because there are so many feelings and thoughts in the atmosphere, and to feel all of them at once is just so overwhelming and exhausting. I used to panic whenever I found myself trapped in the crowd and I've burdened my friends due to this.
Yet I now have to face expectations and pressure from here and there especially after I moved out to the city, I can feel how my heart hardens with ego. I know that I can still feel, but perhaps I just don't care about what other's feel anymore because to the new, grown-up me, what matters the most is me and I spare only a little room for others. Sometimes my actions seem so heartless (like throwing mean jokes) people have to talk to me about it. This also affects my other abilities; I can no longer heal or astral project voluntarily.
So both situations, over-feel and feel-less (sorry for the made-up terms), are never healthy, I know that. I'm far from my balanced state both mentally and spiritually. It is never easy to maintain that balanced state because we just have to sometimes be in hard situations because such is life. I'm pretty sure all empaths experience the same problem at some point.
A balanced empath may feel others without letting the feelings affect himself. He has good control on himself while he knows how he can help the person. I do so wish I could train myself to do this because I feel responsible for inheriting my grandfather's golden abilities and so far I'm the only one in the family.
If you're an empath and facing the same situation (or even better; you've learned how to overcome this problem) feel free to share it in the comment section below. I'd love to hear your thoughts and to learn to develop with someone else.
Namaste
There is another event; I was in the car with one of my instructors and I've been told that his wife had passed away years ago, leaving him and their son behind. As he drove the car in silence, I felt his lost, loneliness, and his love to the deceased wife. I somehow knew that he doesn't want to marry again because he wanted to remain loyal, which is why I salute him. Yet at the same time I felt really bad for him and I could feel my heart ripping slowly during the silence.
This ability is one of few reasons why I can never stand the crowd, because there are so many feelings and thoughts in the atmosphere, and to feel all of them at once is just so overwhelming and exhausting. I used to panic whenever I found myself trapped in the crowd and I've burdened my friends due to this.
Yet I now have to face expectations and pressure from here and there especially after I moved out to the city, I can feel how my heart hardens with ego. I know that I can still feel, but perhaps I just don't care about what other's feel anymore because to the new, grown-up me, what matters the most is me and I spare only a little room for others. Sometimes my actions seem so heartless (like throwing mean jokes) people have to talk to me about it. This also affects my other abilities; I can no longer heal or astral project voluntarily.
So both situations, over-feel and feel-less (sorry for the made-up terms), are never healthy, I know that. I'm far from my balanced state both mentally and spiritually. It is never easy to maintain that balanced state because we just have to sometimes be in hard situations because such is life. I'm pretty sure all empaths experience the same problem at some point.
A balanced empath may feel others without letting the feelings affect himself. He has good control on himself while he knows how he can help the person. I do so wish I could train myself to do this because I feel responsible for inheriting my grandfather's golden abilities and so far I'm the only one in the family.
If you're an empath and facing the same situation (or even better; you've learned how to overcome this problem) feel free to share it in the comment section below. I'd love to hear your thoughts and to learn to develop with someone else.
Namaste
