A PERCEPTION OF GOD

I was reading Paulo Coelho's "Veronika Decides to Die" as I came to this interesting part that reminded me of my dubiety on the story of Adam and Eve. 

"...It was a shame that Allah, Jehovah, God--it didn't matter what name you gave him--did not live in the world today, because if he did, we would still be in paradise, while he would be mired in appeals, requests, demands, injunctions, preliminary verdicts, and would have to justify to innumerable tribunals his decision to expel Adam and Eve from paradise for breaking an arbitrary rule with no foundation in law: of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil thou shalt not eat. 

If he had not wanted that to happen, why did he put the tree in the middle of the garden and not outside the walls of paradise? If she were called upon to defend the couple, Mari would undoubtedly accuse God of administrative negligence, because, in addition to planting the tree in the wrong place, he had failed to surround it with warnings and barriers, had failed to adopt even minimal security arrangements, and had thus exposed everyone to danger.

Mari could also accused him of inducement to criminal activity, for he had pointed out Adam and Eve the exact place where the tree was to be found. If he had said nothing, generation upon generation would have passed on this earth without anyone taking the slightest interest in the forbidden fruit, since the tree was presumably in a forest full of similar trees, and therefore of no particular value…"

The part says it all; all that has interfered my mind for too long. I've doubted the story of Adam and Eve  because in religions, it is said that God is a loving and forgiving Father/King, but the story makes it sound like he was hungry for power, and he acted like a leader who finds joy in giving punishments. Then again, the story reflects our current reality; if God is so kind of loving, why do we have to live in a world where some children are starving to death, some people are dying of serious illnesses, and many other things we have to see and hear, or even feel, every single day. 

I guess I don't have to proceed since the part has clearly expressed my thoughts on religion's point of view on God, and my doubtfulness of Adam and Eve, although it does not mean that I doubt God's presence, nor am I against people who do not believe in his existence OR those who do. But then again, it is always important to be critical, even on religious teachings. I believe that there's nothing taboo about that; you were given intelligence and mind and freedom to explore and discover. I desperately needed to write this part down because I am desperately hungry for a good explanation.

Anyway, those who could give a good explanation on this are always free to leave a comment, as long as it is not offensive and all. Remember, we are always free to express :)

AFTERNOON THOUGHTS

We are individuals and a huge society, living in the world as one. In order to gain what all humans wanted; welfare, love, security, physical needs, we make rules, routines, and system. There are countries in our world, each with its uniqueness and rules the citizens must obey. But there are also international laws and rules our society must follow. 

As a child we go to school for education, and use the knowledge we get from school to look for a job and work. Some of us become doctors, architects, lawyers, and even artists, actors, writers. Some of those people love their job and do it wholeheartedly while some others feel like they have no choice but they do it anyway because of the economy, or they were forced to work as what they are now for some reason. Some choose to 'break the rules' by being corruptors, anarchists, terrorists, but they came from the same society and thus following the same cycle still. And then some of our people rent an apartment or buy a house for themselves, get married, make love, have kids, and teach the kids to do the same thing all over again. It has been our cycle of life for many years. You and I may be different as individuals, but we are following the same tradition and the same system because we live in the same world and we live as a society. 

We are individuals, born and raised in family. From this small, or huge group of people we learn how to feel and how to communicate. We learn that we must look after one and another and we live as one. We learn about how important it is to have other folks with us. When one of us pass away, we mourn, and when a new individual join our group of family, we would welcome him/her and help him/her understand what we've learned in this family. 

But then I came to think about what it feels like if some of us never know that there are other families, other races and other countries out there. They live in a completely remote or abandoned area where they never see technologies or follow our daily activities like going to school or work, buy some groceries at the end of the week, go out with some friends, watch TV, use the internet. They do not have a government, they have their own definition of peace and welfare. They do not use money nor do they know rules of economics. They think like we do. They only know love and hate, and survival. 

And what if some of us decide to make their own rules? They decided to isolate themselves from the society, being carefree of what is going on in our world. 

Are they simply weird because they are not following our system, because they are different? 

We live in the same reality, and yet each of us have the gift to develop that reality. We have creativity and will. We have the power to create. 

So why follow the same old routine? Should we try something new, something that none of our ancestors have ever think of? A modern society that lives in a renewed realm, but still the same earth? What if we create a new story on the world, a story that opens a new possibility on our life? 

Is that even possible? 

WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE A GEMINI

I'm kind of a proud gemini here, being a kind of person who loves to have fun, be random, easy going, and creative. Hmm, don't be surprised if I look excited almost all the time because I get impressed very easily. As a gemini, knowledge is my first love, and arts is my other half. Sometimes I'd spend the entire day learning about something new, like learning astronomy or even a conspiracy theory, and the next day I'd hop into other things like trying out a new recipe I just found in my grandma's vintage recipe book. I pay attention to every details I see. Antiques are my favorite for their unique details and designs. When I go to the malls and see those beautiful clothes, dresses, and shoes on the display, it's not the style that catch my attention, it is the patterns and colors. Colors, especially bright and pastel, are my favorite. I decorate my room with colorful details and it has been my personal wonderland ever since.

Oh, and being a gemini means... you have multiple personalities. One day I can be quite serious and then random the very next day. I can be quiet when I'm around this group of people but very talkative to that group of people. I can be very angry and upset but after a few minutes I act like nothing happens. I'd listen to loud music like Dream Theater's (my favorite progressive metal band) but after I'm done with them I'd go to Disney playlist. I'm just... unpredictable. 

Geminis are usually friendly and easy-going. They love to learn about others and have light conversations with new folks. But careful not to piss them off, they're good at hurting your feelings. 

As a gemini I tend to think a lot and some would think I'm daydreaming. Even the simplest and unnecessary details would keep my mind busy. I like to wonder about what kind of ingredients they put in my daily body lotion and what kind of effect they have or who's the first one to touch the milk box I just bought, and then I would ask some deepest questions I can ever think of to myself, things that involve the mystery of the universe, God, etc. 

Astrologists agree that a gemini's heart is in their head, and it's true. They don't like to burden themselves with deep feelings because they already spend their time and energy to think. But once they get hurt or upset, things would be different and you'll feel the difference. 

Hmm... I couldn't think of anything else right now because there's just too much to say. Typical problem among gemini, haha. Let's just go to typical gemini problems then:

1. Gemini have hard time to fall asleep,

Since they have 12398049580293840 thoughts in mind. This is probably why they look sleepy during the day, too. 

2. They can't stand/sit still, 

because, look! balloons! and you can see the moon from up here!

3. They don't like to wait,

Unless they brought books or games or music player or laptop or photo albums or phones or dogs or crayons or playdoh or puzzles with them, anything that distracts them from boredom. 

4. They hate being ignored,

Especially after a loooong talk/text.

5. They are impatient,

which pretty much explains point number 3 and 4.

6. They'd rather multi-task than doing things one by one.

"Fast is good." - my teacher

7. They love to argue.

It's like gym for their brain. 

8. They get bored very easily.

They'd be cranky once they get bored. 

9. They hate to obey rules with no good reasons/purposes. 

Maybe if you break the rules, weird shit would happen and they just don't want you to see it. Who knows.

10. They are sarcastic.

Do I need to explain this to you?

11. They are flighty. 

Bad at making decisions because they have too much things to consider. 

12. They're good at manipulating a person.

A gemini's dirty skill... something that I'm not really proud of actually. 

And here's a conclusion for you,

gemini are awesome. 

HARI TERAKHIR YANG BUKAN AKHIR DARI SEGALANYA

Ternyata benar apa yang dikatakan Einstein; waktu itu relatif. Mungkin bagi yang lain, 3 tahun itu terasa lama, tapi bagi gue dan teman-teman, 3 tahun terasa terlalu singkat untuk menikmati nikmat dan pahitnya masa-masa SMA. 3 tahun yang lalu, gue datang ke sekolah ini tanpa mengenal siapa-siapa dan tanpa mengetahui seluk-beluk sekolah gue yang baru. Rasanya baru kemarin gue datang ke sekolah dengan rasa campur aduk dan pada akhirnya mengajarkan diri gue sendiri untuk mengenal satu  sama lain. Bahkan gue masih inget betul hari pertama gue disini kayak apa. Tapi tanpa terasa, hari ini adalah hari terakhir gue bisa duduk di kelas bersama teman-teman yang lain sebagai teman seperjuangan dan bersama guru kami, para pahlawan tanpa jasa. 

Gue sudah terbiasa dengan komentar orang-orang tentang sekolah gue karena jauhnya emang amit-amit. Tapi ketika ditanya kenapa gue memilih sekolah itu, gue masih belum bisa menjawab. Gue sendiri nggak ngerti kenapa bisa nyasar kesini, padahal di kota gue ada banyak pilihan sekolah-sekolah yang sama bagusnya. Jujur sekolah ini pun biayanya lumayan mencekik keuangan orangtua gue, apalagi karena bokap gue sudah pensiun. Gue nggak tega sama mereka, tapi di balik semua 'kesulitan' itu gue selalu merasa yakin bahwa gue datang kesini dengan satu alasan.

Dan ternyata, hari ini perasaan gue terbukti kebenarannya. Akhirnya gue sadar bahwa tempat ini adalah tempat dimana gue dibentuk untuk menjadi seseorang yang lebih baik. Gue menemukan teman-teman sejati yang selalu bersedia mendukung gue dan juga guru-guru yang telah mengorbankan waktu dan energi mereka demi kami. Suka dan duka yang gue alami disini adalah pelajaran-pelajaran moral yang paling berharga di masa remaja gue. Masih nggak percaya hari ini benar-benar hari terakhir kami diakui sebagai murid SMA, karena minggu depan kami sudah tidak diatur oleh jadwal, setumpuk buku pelajaran, dan kelas-kelas yang disusun sedemikian rupa. 

Gue bakal kangen bersusah-payah memikul tas berat ke lantai tiga sampe jungkir balik tiap pagi, base class, rela-relain mampir ke kantin demi gorengan dan jajanan murah lainnya, duduk di meja kantin tiap lunch time, godain guru-guru, gangguin Tusti, membuat 'eksperimen sendiri' di lab, dan kegiatan-kegiatan lainnya. Gue bakal kangen sama teman-teman gue; yang sekelas ataupun yang lebih muda, atau yang duduk satu meja pas jam istirahat, dan teman-teman seangkatan lainnya yang telah mewarnai masa-masa SMA gue. Tentu kalau namanya ditulis disini satu-satu nggak bakal cukup, kasihanilah bloggernya. Tapi rasa terimakasih saya begitu besar pada kalian dan juga para guru, dan saya harap saya bisa membalasnya suatu saat nanti dengan membawa harum nama sekolah kami lewat kesuksesan saya di masa depan. 

Oh iya, meskipun gue sudah merasa sebagai orang yang lebih baik, tentu saja gue tetap memiliki kekurangan. Yang pernah saya sakiti, baik dengan sengaja maupun tidak, mohon maaf yang sebesar-besarnya. Mari kita saling mendoakan dan saling berjuang agar pas wisuda nanti kita semua dinyatakan lulus dengan hasil yang membanggakan. Hari ini memang hari terakhir kita menjalani jadwal sekolah pada umumnya, tapi ini bukan akhir dari segalanya. Masih ada tantangan-tantangan lain yang harus kita tempuh untuk menjadi seorang alumni yang berprestasi. 

A SAD NEWS

I was shocked to hear that one of my junior high school friend has passed away this morning due to illness. Strangely though, during this hectic moment I've been thinking about her too lately, remembering how hard she worked to pass the junior high national exam. She failed in all tryouts and some of us, even herself, began to doubt her ability to pass the exam, but it didn't stop her on studying harder and harder than anyone else. She would open her books in the bus and ask her teacher and friends to teach her. At the announcement day, she felt pessimistic and told me that she might not make it, but then she put the brightest smile on her face when our school principal told us that all students in class of 2009/2010 have passed the test. Her hard work has paid off, and she could continue her education in Java.

It's hard for me to believe that our graduation day would be the last day I could see her, but I guess she deserves to be in the Higher Realm to rest.

RIP, my dear friend. You will always be missed.