A BREAKTHROUGH

Forget about the previous post but I'm going to keep it there as a prove of my progress in the future. 

Well, it IS hard to be different, isn't it? I mean, everyone is different, but some of us just feel too different to be a part of the society sometimes.

I have to say this is not one of the toughest years I had, but instead, one of the most challenging years for me. I think 2012 is actually a big 'exercise', as I have to think so many things at once: school, future career, self spiritual development, physical health (that seems to be getting worse) but I eventually found answers.

I have decided to take Biotech or Foodtech as my major in college and that's final (I know I've mentioned taking engineering but turns out that I have more interest in biology/chemistry lab works instead of physics) If I'm lucky enough to have the opportunity to get 'Undangan' (some kind of a 'way' to be accepted at a great public college without tests), I'll probably consider putting med school too as a first choice and foodtech as a second choice, but I'm still not sure. As for now, I'm one of the school's candidates for scholarship opportunity at a global campus that has the best facilities among all colleges in my country. I'm glad to hear from the admin that my chance to get the scholarship is still huge because I was in an early admission. But we still don't know whether I can get it or not, though, so I don't hope much for now. I have this dream of traveling around the world, participating in Switzerland to do researches, working at huge companies such as Unilever or Nestle, and best of all, 'living' in laboratories! So my to-do list for now is: study hard. 

Self spiritual development? I really don't know how I work at it. Sometimes I have some downs and some ups along my spiritual journey. The downs are mostly loneliness and struggles through nightmares and the lack of opportunity to develop but I somehow 'heard' a stranger in one of my vision saying "if I can repel curses, other cases are small enough for me to handle." (as for the curse I might discuss about it later. I just remember I haven't talk anything about it here) As for the ups, I honestly have no idea what makes me so happy sometimes. Sometimes instead of nightmares, I have great dreams that I hardly remember. But I know that the dreams involve my loved ones; those who have passed away like my dog Robin and my ex-US vet grandpa, and those who are still here but are mostly separated from me due to distance. And regarding to this I've decided to keep using my abilities. I know the world is 'shifting' and I want to be a part of the new age evolution. And anyway, "Maktub".

Health issues, health issues, health issues. I understand why I'm pretty weak in the city which is a contrast to my health condition in Papua. I'm allergic to dust and I can't stand heat. I'm also sensitive to others' feelings and I understand most people here are stressed out so I kinda feel what they feel, and it affects my current health condition too. For this reason and some others, I think I have the urge to buy some metaphysical gemstones.

Namaste!~