LEARNING IT THE HARD WAY: GROWING APART

So few nights ago I saw groups of people in my dream, who appear to be groups of friends. Things went well and they seemed to build beautiful friendships together, until something happened and they began to fight each other. Things like this are pretty much common to our lives so this dream doesn’t really excite me, but it does reminds me of something I’ve been keeping in mind. Perhaps it is my subconsciousness trying to give a message.

Over the past few years I’ve been having some trust issues. It’s not that I never trust anyone, but I keep myself from being too open and close to others most of the time, whether I know it or not. Only a few can understand me either, excuse me for being the kind that doesn’t fit in easily.

I have had best friends in my life and happened to build a beautiful friendship with them, but we grew apart eventually and we ended up like we have forgotten all of those days we spent together, all the fun we used to have, and our secrets. And now I think it’s happening again. Not just to my best friends, but to some other close friends I used to hang out with.

Sure I can socialize pretty well and I will make new friends eventually, but I guess I’m not so good at making (best) friends. I guess I’m always afraid that the friendship will end up the same way, and they do. It’s either because of my own fear and thoughts that it will end like that or we’re simply growing apart. It is a normal thing and it happens to everyone, but I don’t take it that easily. Personally, trusting someone is hard, but once I found someone I trust completely and someone who understands, I consider them as my best friends. That’s the point of friendship after all, the one who understands you and the one you trust. But so far, starting from the earliest friendship I had with my childhood best friend, most of them don’t last. And losing a best friend is the hardest thing to face.

I don’t blame my best friends, I don’t blame anyone. Growing apart and losing someone you love are natural phenomenons one should deal with. Yes, now I’m learning it the hard way. Let's get used to it and live life anyway. Always remember to accept reality and life as what it is.