THE SCHOOL SYSTEM AND A REBELLIOUS STUDENT

It's funny to remember how rebellious I was back then during Junior High. And actually, I do not have any regrets or guiltiness at all. I'm proud of myself for this.

I skipped class very often because I was wasting my time learning about something that I will not use in the future. I drew on the toilet's wall as a personal protest to school's lack-of-creativity system; teachers were mad at me because I always sketch something while they explained the subjects in such boring way. I would sleep in class due to lack of sleep time because there were too many homeworks given, not caring about teachers' complains to me.

I was like the 'black bandit' for the teachers of my old school. Only a few of them understand the reasons for my deeds; and the rest of them were just give me that 'bad' looks. I heard from a teacher who was in my side that, the other teachers believed I would have lower grades than any other students due to the behavior. I went home frustrated, having no idea about why teachers hated me that much. I believe, drawing in class or skipping class are not a wrong behavior. I actually have the right to do that. Teachers often said, if we don't want to learn, we should get out from the class. So I did. But then, I was driving them nuts.

But then, what happened?

I ranked 5 in class, got many As or Bs on the report card even tho I never really care about scores and I'm not a diligent person, and my kindest teacher asked me if I can draw something special for her. As my tribute for her kindness and loving nature, I drew as perfect as possible, and the next day after I gave the drawing, she opened her folder and show the drawing I made for her in front of the teachers. "Look! The 'Black Bandit' made me this! I guess you have no reason to called her the 'Black Bandit' anymore."

I smiled every time I remembered those dark yet fun days. Because of my rebellious behaviors, teachers always recognized me very well each time I came back to school as an alumni. And yet, I did not change. I am still a rebellious soul, skipping class at 2nd semester during 10th grade, and I will keep being a rebel until the system changes. And yes, until they allow me to draw in class.

SELF-AWARENESS; YOU ARE MORE THAN WHAT YOU THINK

Ever compare yourself with others? Have you ever feel the feeling of unfairness lurk inside your heart as you take a look at the mirror, see yourself, have a disgusted look on the face, and imagine someone that is more beautiful than you are, and you feel ashamed of your body?

Well, I did.

I am not a beautiful girl. I am not elegant, I am not slim, I am not pretty, my hair is not silky. To be honest, the only body part that I like is my pair of eyes, because it's brown and deep. I often blamed my physical appearance as something that makes people don't accept me. I often wish that I was born beautiful with silky hair and slim body so people would adore me more.

I've been struggling over this feeling from time to time, until my inner-self told me about this;

That this body is NOT my true self. It's only a tool to perform a roll in this world. My true self is immortal, powerful, aware and bright... its ability is unlimited. It cannot be crush by anything.

We're only using this body for a while. The physical body is mortal, and yet we will use different bodies from time to time.

We always thought that we ARE this body, this body is our true self, our true characteristics, our soul. That is why, we often feel unsatisfied with what we have in our physical body. We sometimes feel that it's unfair to have such imperfect body while others could feel confident with their beautifully-created body and face. Well here's the truth; there is no such thing as imperfection and ugliness.


You see, our God is perfect. He creates such beautiful panoramas around us. Take another look at the flowers. If the flowers were created perfectly, so did you. So did all of us.

The body is a tool to perform our missions, purpose of life. Like a puppet performance, the puppet master MUST adore the doll he/she would use to ensoul his/her part in the show. If the puppet master does not like his/her puppet, he/she would not have such successful show. He/she will forever suffer in dissatisfaction.

Love yourself. You are more than what you think. You are bigger than what you've thought. You're not only a walking human body that you might dislike for its appearance, it is not the true you. You are a soul, a beautiful soul, that currently takes a roll of this huge performance we held together. Yet, you need a tool to perform perfectly, which is your body, your physical appearance. Your performance would be nothing if you do not adore your special tool.

Be aware with your true self. Listen to your inner voice, let it guide you. Hold your heart and let the love spread on your soul.

http://www.gemmastone.org/

Namaste!~

THE ART OF DIFFERENCES

Why there should be differences in the world? Why there should be Asians, black and white? Why there should be night and morning, light and darkness?

Take a look at a beautiful garden! It contains flowers in different colors. They are different in species and each has its own uniqueness. But when they all unite, they will spark in such harmonious beauty!

A rainbow contains 7 different colors that makes it look beautiful when painted on the sky :)

If a rainbow and a garden look beautiful in differences, so do humans. You see, when all people in the world look the same, and if there's no night or no morning, imagine how monotonic this world would be. There will be no harmony, no excitement... A 'Yin' without 'Yang' would be nothing...

Whoever you are and whatever race you have, please love yourself for being 'the one and only' and one of the components of the earth's 'art of differences' :D

Namaste!~

SOMETHING FOR EVERYBODY; POWERFUL MESSAGE FOR THE LONELY AND SAD ONES

Some desperate people came to me lately, either in real life or social network, asking for help. And I completely understand how it feels to be in their position, since I was there. The feeling of lost, lonely, frustrated... combine in one and block the eyes from the truth about 'who you are'.

What's 'who you are'? This wonderful and lovely video will explain it to you. Activation of the third eye chakra is also included.



Because we are all one, just like pieces of bread from a single loaf. Namaste~

COUNT DOWN TO THE 4TH DIMENSION; CELEBRATING THE EARTH'S REVOLUTION

Open the door, we've walked trough time as the earth spins in the universe. It's a brand new day, a brand new world. Our world is crawling to the dimension of peace and love; the 4th Dimension.

We're reaching the era we've all been waiting for in all these 13.000 years. Our earth is new to the universe, unlike all those distant worlds out there that already existed in million years. We're catching up with the others, standing up from tragedies and now, holding our hands together to step on this golden era. Imagine a life without racism and screams of terror. Now isn't that exciting?

As we're standing here to celebrate the revolution of our world, each of us takes a role to make a difference. Some choose to become artists who paint their dreams of a better earth, some choose to hum the universe's message, some choose to be the rebels that will break the earth's old systems.

It's not going to be easy to heal the earth and to raise it to the higher illumination of light, yet it is not impossible. It takes time, it takes togetherness. We have to remember that we have each other and we are all standing on the same world.

It is such an amazing fact that many people already are conscious about this revolution, and are aware of what they should do for help. I found countless wonderful people that are healers, nature whisperers, artists, and energetic love providers who are ready to make beautiful changes.

You, every single of you, are invited to celebrate this revolution, to take part and to carve your dreams of the better earth along with any other people who are also a part of you. So smile and hold our hands, enjoy the adventure!

Namaste~

Basa-Basi 2 (WARNING: NOT FOR WARAS PEOPLE)

Gila gila gila gila gila. Kenapa gue menyebutkan kata ini sebanyak lima kali? Karena gue suka angka 5 #abaikan #sumpahnggakpenting. Kenapa gue menggunakan kata "Gila"? Ya karena kata itu menggambarkan apa yang terjadi pada hari ini.

Emang ya, hidup itu enak banget kalo kita jadi orang gila. Bukan gila sih, kalo gue bilang gue gila, gue takut didatengin suster-suster yang membawa ambulans RSJ malem-malem gini. Mungkin lebih tepatnya freak. Ya, saya mengakui bahwa saya adalah seorang freak. Lo pernah ga sih loncat-loncat sendiri di tempat umum? Sumpah itu asik. It feels good, men (and women). Hanya saja, hal ini sangat tidak mengasikkan bagi teman atau keluarga yang berada di sekitar anda.

Kegilaan ini muncul di pagi hari, pas pelajaran BI. Gue dan seorang kawan duduk sampingan pas gurunya lagi nyetel video wisata di kelas. Videonya tentang pertambangan sulfur di daerah pegunungan. Kami nge-dub orang-orang yang nongol di video itu. Gara-gara itu kami heboh sendiri di kelas yang sangat tenang. Ada salah satu scene dimana beberapa orang membawa sekeranjang lempingan berwarna kuning. Karena sotoy, gue langsung nge-dub "kerupuuuuuukk... kerupuuuuukkk...". Gue heran, kenapa lempingan itu nggak habis-habis dan nggak ada yang memakannya. Dan setelah diamati, ternyata itu kepingan sulfur. Cacat.

Di ending video, ada gambar abstrak yang merupakan layout dari TV Show tadi. Temen gue tiba-tiba berseru "ih itu kok kayak hantu?". Di ujung kanan gambar itu ada bercak putih yang rupanya mirip rupa kuntilanak. Persis di bagian belakangnya, ada 'curls' warna hitam yang persis seperti rambut. Seorang teman kami langsung memperhatikan dan berpendapat bahwa gambar itu justru mirip kambing. Spontan, semua mata langsung tertuju pada gambar itu. Sesosok hantu disamakan dengan seekor kambing. Miris.

Pas jam gathering, kelompok yang saat itu sedang bertugas mengadakan Bible Trivia. Kebetulan kelompok gue mempunyai anak yang super rajin baca alkitab, jadi kami menyerahkan semuanya ke tangan Tuhan dan tangan anak ini. Berandalkan alkitab yang sudah robek, ternyata kelompok kami menang! horeeee! Semua orang di ruangan itu menduga bahwa hadiah dari game ini pasti coklat b*ngb*ng. apa nggak, permen y*pi. Gue berpikir, ya lumayan lah, daripada dapet gelas dengan dot dengan gambar singa (sumpah, gue pernah dapet hadiah ini pas menang lomba menulis surat tingkat SMP). Nah. ternyataaaaa... yang kami dapatkan adalah selembar kertas warna orange bertuliskan:

1ST PLACE

MIRACLE FROM GOD

Jam terakhir pun kami gunakan untuk mengerjakan tugas mengenai biography pas pelajaran EL. Kami disuruh menuliskan "the 'must-have criteria' of the biography you read". saya dan rekan kerja saya pun menuliskan hal-hal dibawah ini:
1. Name
2. Date of Birth
3. Place of Birth
4. Family
5. Early Life
6. Career
7. The journey
8. Marriage
9. Achievement
10. Death

Jawaban di nomor 10 adalah kengerian abadi.

Task 2. Kami disuruh memilih satu tokoh dan membuat pertanyaan-pertanyaan yang ingin kami sampaikan padanya. Sekitar 15 menit saya habiskan untuk memilih seorang tokoh bersama rekan saya. Awalnya George Washington. Lalu Pak Praise (bukan nama yang sebenarnya). Kemudian Cleopatra. Dan jadinya The Rev. Abstrak sekali pilihan kami.

Nah, untuk sesuai keputusan, di bawah ini adalah pertanyaan-pertanyaan hasil diskusi kami;

1. What makes you love the drum so much?
2. Who are your inspiration?
3. If songs could change the world, what song would you play to make a difference? Why?
4. What would you teach to your children? Would you teach them how to play drum?
5. How did you die?
Kesannya memang sangat jahat, tapi semua fans A7X di sekolah sepertinya muak dengan kisah bahwa The Rev meninggal karena kepeleset di genteng pas sedang berperan sebagai Santa Claus. Masih mending car crash, atau natural death. Kepeleset di genteng terkesan kurang elit.

Setelah pulang sekolah, gue dan sesama 'creepy metal gurl' (note untuk teman gue: gue geli sendiri nulis ini sumpah) nongkrong sejenak di kantin sebelum bergegas ke mobil antar-jemput masing-masing. Gue ditantang teman gue buat ngegodain seorang 'cute boy' (idola para gadis angkatan kami di sekolah) yang saat itu sedang bermain kartu bersama kawan-kawannya. Dengan pede, gue mendekati cowo ini bersama teman gue, tapi pas udah deket gue malah ngakak dan begonya, kepeleset. Garut abis.

Jadi itulah journey saya untuk hari ini. Pulang-pulang gue langsung molor 2 jam dan diem sepanjang malam karena capek ngakak. Tapi gapapa, ngakak itu berkat untuk orang freak. Muahahaha.

XOXO~

Basa-Basi

Hai, gue mau galau-galau ria disini dulu ya hahahah. Langsung to the point saja. Jadi gini, gue itu orang yang suka berpikir dalam-dalam. Ga pernah-pernahnya gue ngeblank, bahkan dalam waktu sedetik. Dan kebanyakan yang gue pikirkan itu topik yang dalam, seperti sistem yang berlaku di dunia, kenapa ini harus begini, kenapa harus begitu, dsb. Gue sendiri ga ngerti kenapa gue cenderung memikirkan topik-topik seperti itu, mungkin emang pikiran gue diciptakan untuk itu. Kadang dalam waktu bersamaan, topik yang gue pikirkan bisa lebih dari satu sekaligus, dan ini membuat otak gue capek. Kadang gue pengen mikirin yang ringan-ringan aja, atau ga mikir sama sekali, tapi rasanya susah sekali. Dan gue pengen menyalurkan isi-isi pikiran yang sepertinya sudah terlalu penuh ini tapi gatau sama siapa. Ya gue udah ngobrol tentang apa-apa yang gue pikirkan sama seseorang, tapi entah kenapa rasanya masih belom cukup. Gue pengen ngobrol sama orang banyak yang bijak dan yang dewasa, yang punya waktu untuk mendengarkan. Tapi susah nemuin orang seperti itu. Dan kadang, kalo dapet orang buat dijadiin temen curhat sekalipun, gue gatau ngomongnya mesti gimana. Dan akhirnya, pikiran-pikiran ini menumpuk dan gue jadi kewelahan sendiri.

Satu hal lagi, gue jadi merasa kurang sreg sama orang-orang tanpa alasan apapun. Gue merasa ada yang kurang di kehidupan. Gue udah 16 tahun tinggal disini dan merasa kurang puas tanpa alasan yang jelas, padahal gue udah punya segalanya. Keluarga, punya. Teman, punya. Hidup yang sehat, punya. Gue ga perlu berjuang untuk makan ataupun beli baju. Apa coba yang kurang?

Belakangan gue juga sering ngerasa getir. Melihat orang-orang yang kurang beruntung, yang berkeliaran di bawah teriknya matahari, juga berita-berita mengenai perang dan penyiksaan, membuat gue beranggapan bahwa hidup di bumi itu melelahkan, padahal semestinya ga melelahkan seperti itu. Kadang nggak enak juga menjadi orang yang terlalu berempati, hal kecil yang disandang orang lain bisa gue pikirkan dalam jangka waktu yang panjang.

Dan setelah gue pikirkan lagi tadi, mungkin rasa 'kurang sreg' dan 'kehilangan gairah hidup' ini terbentuk dari pengalaman hidup di bumi, pengalaman menjalani sistem-sistemnya. Gue sangat mendambakan kehidupan yang damai, tanpa sistem 'kasta' dan tanpa kebrutalan, dan gue percaya semua orang juga mendambakan hal itu. Kapan dunia bisa seperti itu? entahlah. Saat ini, manusia masih beranggapan bahwa apa-apa yang tersedia di dunia itu terbatas, bahkan kebahagiaan itu terbatas. Maka dari itu, mereka melakukan apa saja untuk mendapatkan segala sesuatu yang tersedia di bumi untuk kelangsungan hidup, bahkan dengan cara yang brutal sekalipun. Padahal Tuhan itu Maha Adil, tentu saja yang disediakan Dia itu cukup untuk semua orang, selama manusia rela saling berbagi. (nah, ini salah satu hasil pemikiran gue yang dalam itu)

Ah, gue masih pengen basa-basi disini, tapi gue gatau nyusun kalimatnya gimana.

Oh iya, gue ingin memberikan hadiah untuk kalian semua yang berupa suatu kalimat. Simple, tapi jika didalami maknanya bersama-sama, kalimat ini bisa mengubah segala sesuatu yang berlaku di dunia.

God is in you and God is in me. Namaste!